I was spending a quiet afternoon, well quietish if I am honest with a ten month old and a two year old when my phone beeped. As it was approaching school run time I checked it just in case it was a traffic jam or special event tip off which would require an immediate dash out of the door to secure a parking spot less than half a mile away.
Instead it was from a good friend saying ' I just saw your book on Amazon.' My first reaction was amazement as the publisher hasn't told me it is available yet but when I went over to Amazon and typed in my name, up popped my book Tumbling Through Life. No cover image or synopsis yet mind you and it says it's out of stock but you can order it and it has an isbn number and everything. I have to say from that point on it seemed rather surreal. A quick visit to the US version of Amazon and up it popped again and apparently in stock there.
Now I am worrying, what if someone buys it and hates it? What if I know them? What if they like it and I never manage to finish another manuscript, or if I do it falls short of expectation. I never thought the book appearing would make me feel so very vulnerable, it is like a little bit of me is invested in the book and so it's rejection or acceptance reflects on me too. Anyway only time will tell.